Why Children Can't Always Do Two Things at Once

Can children:
Pour milk and answer a question?
Do homework while watching TV? 
Text and talk to you at the same time? 

Can adults:
Watch TV and check their email at the same time?
Browse FB and talk to others? 
Lull a baby back to sleep and write this blog post? (My current situation.)

The brain can only do one task that requires thinking at a time (Connell & McCarthy, 2014). Television requires thinking. If you are asking a question and your child is watching television, she is going to have these responses:

1. She stops watching and listens to you.
2. She ignores you and keeps watching.
3. She tries to go back and forth between listening to you and watching, so she really doesn't understand what you are asking and is probably annoyed.

Only tasks that are automatic can be done with a thinking task. Walking and talking can happen only if you have fully learned to walk. Until then walking is a thinking activity (2014).

Some adults say they can text and watch television at the same time, but they really can't because both require thinking. What they are doing is rapidly switching back and forth between the two. Children cannot do this (2014). That's why reading with the television on is not a good idea. One cannot be fully involved in their reading.

So...

Can children:
Pour milk and answer a question? If they are still learning how to pour and it requires concentration, children cannot pour milk and answer a question at the same time. They will either stop pouring, ignore you, or spill the milk (2014).

Do homework while watching TV? No. Both require thinking. Consider switching it off.

Text and talk to you at the same time? No. Both require thinking. You'll want them to put down the phone before the conversation begins.

Can adults:
Watch TV and check their email at the same time? No. Both require thinking. They can rapidly switch back and forth between the TV and computer.

Browse FB and talk to others? No. Both require thinking. Consider logging off when you are around others.

Lull a baby back to sleep and write this blog post?  No. Both required thinking and two hands. One needed rhythmic swaying. This post waited.

Works Cited

Connell, G., & McCarthy, C. (2014). A moving child is a learning child: how the body teaches the brain to think (birth to age 7). Minneapolis, MN: Free Spirit Publishing.

Super Bowl: Defend Your Team

Who's going to win the Super Bowl: Eagles or Patriots? Even if you know who your child is rooting for (even if it is the same team you are), make them defend their choice today. Ask them, why are you cheering for the Eagles? Don't let them say they are better. Make them provide specific examples. They could talk about the players, stats, or any other conditions that they feel make the team more likely to win. You could give them a few examples if they don't know how to respond. "I think the _____ will win because..."  This could turn into a great debate or two minute conversation. Both are great. Explaining why and defending their decisions are necessary life (and comprehension) skills, so why not start with the Super Bowl?

Stress & Books

Sometimes kids need a book to help them through a stressful situation. Today my daughters' needed A Very Special Snowflake by Don Hoffman. We were at the doctors' office. I couldn't guarantee my three year olds that they wouldn't be getting a shot. They were on edge. While we waited for the doctor to come, I pulled out the book. We read the words and hunted for the white dog, Snowflake, who was hidden in the snow. They loved finding them. It helped them relax.

Kids' lives are filled with stress. Some more than others. Books will be away to help them deal with the stress or even escape for a little bit. If you are going through a challenge together, consider picking a book to read. The bonding time and the conversation will help.

For a more serious letter of how a book helped a boy cope with his mother's cancer, check this out: This Mom's Poignant Letter to Author Rick Riordan Is the Sweetest Thing You'll Read Today

Screenshot from Amazon

Reading & Experiences

Today I took my daughters to the dentist for the first time. Despite being very timid, they did amazing. No meltdowns. They opened their mouths. They even answered a question or two. I had to repeat it to the dental hygienist because their answers were barely peeps. They even said when we were going home that they liked the dentist! It helped that our dental hygienist and dentist are the nicest people in the world, but they have been around other nice people and had breakdowns. What was the biggest help in this success was reading Usborne First Experiences: Going to the Dentist a thousand times before our big day. They knew exactly what to expect thanks to that book and our discussions based on that book.

Experiences are prime reading topics. These topics can help kids prepare for the dentist, the orthodontist, the doctor, the zoo, a wedding, owning a pet, or even a vacation. Children are never too old or too young to read information on your upcoming events with you.

For example, you are planning a trip to Washington D.C. Check out books about the city from your library. For very young children you can show them the pictures and talk about the places you will be visiting. They'd love to see a preview. Once you get there, you'll be able to point out, "Look that was in the book!" For older children and teens, let them help you plan. You can look at travel guides and websites together. They will be more excited for your trip because they have some ownership of the plans.

Experiences are close to a child's heart, so learning about them will be too. Let's help each other. Comment below how you incorporate reading into your experiences.

Screenshot from Usborne Books & More

Too Busy to Talk to Your Children?

How often do you talk to your children? I mean really talk. Talk that goes beyond, "Stop doing that." Talking that revolves around a shared experience like going to the park or cooking, how everyone's day went, or even what happened in the TV show you all just watched together. I ask because learning to read for some children is difficult. Phonics, fluency, vocabulary, and comprehension can be tough. As a reading specialist, I personally found the students who had reading difficulties (with no medical diagnosis or learning disabilities) and had parents who had engaging conversations with them consistently and daily overcame these difficulties with greater ease.

Why is this? I found these parents are providing their children with rich background knowledge. They are learning words from their parents they may not learn somewhere else. They are also forming emotional ties to the words. Children use this background knowledge to understand and discuss the text or make connections to a word that they need to decode.

Make time to talk. Here are some quick tips:

1. Put away your phone, computer, or any technology that takes you mentally away. Seriously. Just put it away for at least an hour a night. Devote that time to your family.

2. Turn down the radio in the car. You all are stuck together. Why not make use of the time?

3. Do chores together. While you wash the dishes, have your child dry them.

4. Go somewhere together and leave technology behind.

5. Play! Build with legos. Build a fort. Play with dolls. Just play!

6. Share a piece of text each night. It could be a chapter book, a meme, a post, a comic, an article from a magazine, or a short story. You all have something in common to make reference to and even have some inside jokes.

If you still feel too busy, ask yourself, "How can I include my child in this job I have to do?" or "Do I really need to do this right now?" The bottom line is finding time talk is necessary. Let's help each other. Comment below how you make sure to talk with your kids each day.